Programming Meeting

MAJ: Well, we've solved the Muppet crisis.

Lawful Order

COL: Go into obstruction mode.
Me: That's my default mode. As you well know.

Shopping List

Greg: Pork, fish, sausage. I want that!
Me: Sausage made out of fish and pork?
Greg: No, sausage made out of porkfish!
Me: No such thing as a porkfish.
Greg: Yes, there is!
Me: No.
Greg: Yes! I can't believe you've never seen a porkfish. Swimming around with their little snouts, adorable!
Me: Fish don't have snouts.
Greg: Porkfish do.
Me: Nope. And pigs don't have gills.
Greg: Well, no. I don't know why you even needed to point that out.

Brilliant! New! Idea!

Me: ...and I will try not to be swayed by the fact that it was [composer] who thought of it, because he is a jerkwad.
SGM: That has indeed been brought up.
Me: I should think so.

Ah, singers. I've been one.

Singer: It's an instrumental.
Me: No, it's vocal.
Singer: But there's no vocal part.
Me: Yeah, the last soloist probably just didn't return it. When [arranger] comes in, I'll have him print another one.
Singer: But...we need to know what key it's in now.
Me: ...okay...?
Singer: How can we tell what key it's in?
Me: From...all the other parts?